Pages

Friday, 28 November 2014

THE WRONG SKETCH!!

Hey guys,

Thank God its Friday. Hope you had a good week? I was really looking forward to the weekend myself because this has probably been the most busiest week in November for me. Sometimes I just miss Uni cuz at least, it felt like I had a little life then. This work life isn't for me at all...well, it is (of cos I love what I do and a girl's got to make some money). But really though, this work life aint easy at all..I even have to go to work tomorrow (can you imagine the imagination) sigh* the life of a working class lady..it hurts! it really does..I guess I just have to embrace it..cant complain.

This week seemed to have had quite a lot of celebrations especially by the law students. I was invited to a call to bar dinner/house party by an older colleague but I was reluctant to go as I dint know the celebrant in question + I wasn't sure I was going to know anyone there and I wasn't going with someone I knew very well. Anyways, I decided to go (it wont hurt to meet new faces).

Getting to the party, I was welcomed and introduced to a few people then I headed straight for the food as I  was really famished and tired from work (no time to front for food). Just as I was about having my first spoon of rice, a figure appeared before me and I just wondered why someone would just surface at that crucial point in time starring like he had caught me stealing food. I looked to see who it was but I dint know the fellow so I said 'hi, are you okay? then he goes 'yes my camp snob' (woo!!! excuse me!!) is someone suffering from  a bad eye sight? I turned to see if there was anyone else behind me but there was none. So, I asked him are you referring to me? I was surprised at the way he said YES YOU!!! with so much confidence. O-kay!! so I dont even know this guy and he calls me a snob? issorii. I asked to please give me some minutes so I could finish my food then we could talk..may be the hunger was having an effect on my visual memory.

After eating, he asked if I remembered a day I was walking with a friend of mine at camp looking for where we could charge our phones and then a guy stopped us asking if we needed any help then I just stopped, looked and walked off like he was invisible. Then the second time, we were all assembled on the parade ground, then he waved and I just threw my face away like who the heck is this dude waving, I dont know you!. Having heard these, I could not but utter a loud WOW!. I felt bad because I actually never realized that occurred at all.Of cos I remember the day of the first incident but that was plain wrong timing,,I mean camp on its own was a frustrating environment + this incident took place very early in the morning and I am not an early morning person. The fact I was up that early was enough reason for me to be malfunctioning. I actually taught it was a random guy who was lost just like us and needed to ask questions on finding his way around or something (you know now, the blind cannot lead the blind) then the waving incident was totally unintentional and besides, I am short sighted so you can see you - see me -see you, but I actually cant see you lol. I explained that the whole snob thing was just a miss perception cuz I am actually really welcoming on a normal day and I apologized.

I still found this a bit funny though because it reminded me of a sketch someone took of me a few months back at a park that I kept wondering who exactly was in it cuz I honestly dint think it was me.

??????????????
I mean, no one's perfect but I noticed that people see people differently. May be that was how my head shape looked to him or may be that was how he saw my cheeks lol but that certainly isn't how I look in reality or is it? lol. I was reading something someday about the difference between good artists and the 'not so good' ones then I stumbled upon a statement that said ''Firstly, people who cant draw well arent seeing the world as it really is. When we look at objects, our visual systems automatically misjudge such attributes such as size shape color, and research shows that some of these miss perceptions translate into drawing errors.

Relating this to what happened, I can totally agree with that statement. Everyone is an artist and everyone has different perceptions about different people. How you choose to see/view someone is entirely up to you. If you choose to see the negative sides of people, then you get the negative results from them but if you choose to see the positive sides, you get positive results from them just the same way we view life on its own. How you choose to view life determines what you get out of it.

The bottom line is, how people choose to see you is entirely their decision and not yours. You cannot try to fit into their sketches of you cuz they aren't as perfect as the original. Rather they have to amend their sketches, perceptions and views of you in other to get better results for themselves. Never change who you are just because someone thinks negative of you. You are beautiful and you are perfect in Gods eyes.

I hope you enjoy the rest of your weekend.

Saturday, 22 November 2014

LIFE OUTSIDE MY COMFORT ZONE!!!

Hey guys,

Happy weekend. I hope you've enjoyed your weekend so far? Mine has been a well rested one. I really needed that rest cuz the stress from work on Friday wasn't even taking it easy on me at all, it knocked me out completely. I am glad I feel better now and I can attempt to start getting ready for the new week.

Sometime this year, I did a bit of self analysis and discovered that I have been growing but actually not growing. How do I mean? Growth begins when life begins and life begins at the end of your comfort zone. Yes I have been growing physically, moving from one stage of life to the other but I haven’t been growing because literally almost all my growth and experiences have happened within my comfort zone.


I am usually not one who loves to go out there, make my voice or opinion heard, try new things or take any sort of risk for the fear of things going wrong or not being good at a particular task. I am one who loves her bed, loves working with and taking her time, loves her leisure, freedom, food, sticking to daily routines, sticking to the known and keeping her opinions to herself. I am also one who tends to think about an Idea, then think about it a little too much (like how do I start, how do I go about it, will it make sense and many more), psych myself out and eventually do nothing about it. I really do love my comfort zone but I had to break out somehow. Inspired by a book on personal development and mental growth I read, I decided to set myself to a challenge of stepping out of my comfort zone and trying out new things.

Starting up a blog was more or less the first step. It was entirely new (not something I would normally think of doing on a normal day) and I knew diddly squat about blogging. The decision to start involved a lot of back and fort’s as I wasn't sure if I was up to the task (normally, I would over think this, psych myself out and do nothing like I said earlier) but perhaps, the first time in my life I dint let the fact that I knew nothing about it stop me. It’s been almost 3 months now since I started my blog and I must say, apart from being a new found hobby, starting a blog has been one of the most enriching activities of my life. I mean, I never would have discovered the potential to write If I dint start writing (you know what they say, the best way to learn how to write is to start writing) and I never would have learnt quite a lot of personal development tips and other useful information If I dint start researching and reading books. Quite a lot of friends and fellow blog readers send me messages saying how they really love my blog and how they can relate and learn a couple of things from shared experiences and lessons learnt. It makes me really happy to know that people actually read my blog and find some sense in it lol. (Huge thanks to all my blog readers).

In addition to blogging, learning to drive was something I always found excuses to postpone. I was always very comfortable having people drive me around (lol not like a boss but..) because of course, there is no stress in being driven or not trying to learn the roads yourself because all you do is sit in the car, daydream and viola! You've arrived your destination. Asides that, I always had a phobia for driving. I felt I wasn't up to it and mentally not ready to get behind the wheels and so, I never wanted to try. Learning to drive (now knowing how to), was another step out of my comfort zone and I must say it feels really good to know that I can always get set, grab the keys and drive myself without waiting on anyone or working with other people’s time. Also, I am gradually getting familiar with the roads which I never would have been able to if I dint make the effort to learn.

Also, there has been a shift from familiar work experiences to unfamiliar ones. This particular shift from medical related work experiences, health care and working with kids to business related work experiences has been a major challenge for me. I must say this has been more or less the major push out of my comfort zone as it is more demanding, more exposing, more professional, extra hours of work, a bit of official travelling, meeting new people, increased responsibilities and all. I am usually used to more flexibility, getting to work not exactly in time and getting away with it most times, dressing down most of the time, less professionalism and formality at work place, living work earlier than I normally should, going home not having to do any extra self study and many more. But now, I am required to be at work exactly on time, appear well groomed and professional, respond to calls and emails, meet new clients and basically take on more responsibilities. I would say, in as much as this is way out of my comfort zone, I am quite happy that in doing all these, I would realize some things/abilities I probably never knew I had, develop some new skills, build my confidence and public speaking ability, learn and gain more experiences that would be useful for me in the future and basically grow mentally.

While work has taken over my week days, I decided to start learning a bit of catering (baking for now) during the weekends (not all weekends though) and so far, it’s been good. I learnt to bake some cakes and make spring rolls (all thanks to my friend Oby). I am looking forward to learning how to make other pastries and acquiring more skills in other areas like sewing and bead making with time by the grace of God.

To be very honest, life outside my comfort zone has been really challenging. I barely have time to sleep as much as I normally would love to, but I believe that growth can be uncomfortable as it involves stretching out of your comfort zone and once I stretch into new capabilities, I have to keep practicing them until they become comfortable. And in the process, I am expanding my comfort zone to make room for new abilities which I may never discover if I don’t try to stretch. I encourage everyone to also try stretching out too, It may hurt or get really uncomfortable but one thing I know for sure is that you would grow.


Have a nice week guys J

Tuesday, 18 November 2014

THE HAIR STRUGGLE SO FAR......

Wow! It’s a couple of days to Christmas. This year really had some wings yo!..When was it January and now Christmas is around the corner? Well God has been faithful, can’t thank him enough. I guess I’ll do a separate thanks giving post soon but in the mean time, thank you guys for the comments and contributions you made concerning my dreams. I am happy to announce that I haven’t had any creepy ones since the last episode. All thanks to God and my mama’s bed. Lol.

So on Sunday after church, I ran into some old friends I hadn’t seen in ages. One of them paused for a minute and gave me this surprised look saying ‘Omg!! I love your hair, is that all yours?’ And the other asked if I’d been growing my hair from my mother’s womb (lol jokes!) I found that really funny and shook my head (only if they knew the realness of the struggles my dear hair has been through).


I was only about 6 years old when I became tired of my hair as my mum would either comb the scalp out of my head or stretch the life out of my hair in attempts to style it, braid it, or pack it into something we called 'shuku' (could be one, two, three or four shuku depending on how she felt on that day lol). The worst was threading (my Nigerian sisters can relate). After threading, I always turned red with my eyebrows almost at my hair line and my brain almost protruding out of my skull due to the level of stretching involved in the threading process (even to sleep was a battle).



My mum really took care of my hair though (love her to bits)! She had a certain love for it (as her only princess). She would wash it on weekends, grease it and do the plaits depending on the styles given to us by the school. My hair was natural btw, it was a diehard hair, really thick and full. Hence, it cost extra to make at the saloon. My mum wanted me to stay natural till I was about 15 but she was faced with two choices: either to cut the hair or to relax it as it was obvious that I was tired and couldn’t handle my though natural hair. My hair was finally relaxed and then, I became in control lol. For the first time I ever saw my hair so black, long and silky. I became Raponzel overnight and as time went on, my new look brought out the shakara side of me that I began spending so much time with the mirror, styling my hair, painting my lips and nails, drawing my eyebrows and basically obsessing about my new look. My mum became scared that my hair was going to be a major distraction from my books and so, the worst thing happened; SHE CUT MY HAIR!! (Where’s my mother? What did you do with her?) I couldn’t believe it. I was so heartbroken but she carried me on her lap and said ‘it will grow again; I just need you to focus on your books for now’. I understood with her and I guess it was all for the best.

THE STRUGGLES

I have never really been a fan of hair products but I had managed to grow my hair just by continuous braiding and relaxing, to a decent length (somewhere between neck & shoulder length) by JS 3. I was hopeful it was going to get to armpit length and then bra strap length which was my ideal length. On getting to SS1, I had to change schools from the outskirt of town into the heart of town. I was really happy about the idea of being closer to home and having a better boarding life experience. On receiving the school’s prospectus, the broken pieces of my heart that was in the mending process shattered again. I realized that one of the requirements of the students was to have a low cut (God why me?). I refused to accept that and I told God I must be an exception he must favor me in the sight of man. So, I came up with a plan and told my mum I wasn’t going to cut my hair but I was going to wear my beret, walk into the school with courage and faith that I would be allowed to kip my hair. The next thing I know, my hair’s all over the floor in front of the matron’s house with the snip-snip sound of the scissors behind my ears. So much for being hopeful. May be having hair wasn’t meant for me. Alright, I decided to accept my fate.  

Spot me if you can.



After school, I relaxed my hair and began growing again. I still had to do a bit of threading just so my hair could stretch and grow faster. I was able to grow it to just below shoulder length (my hair grows fast btw) and just before I traveled to the Uk, it had an encounter with a chewing gum I had mistakenly taken a nap with in my mouth and had ended up getting tangled in my hair (luckily for me, it was at the back). That resulted in me cutting it down to about neck length (bad luck yeah?) well, I thought so too. As if that wasn’t enough, I got to the Uk in hopes that the weather was going to help in the growth but baby, I was wrong. 


One cold evening I had returned from lectures with my roommate Suzzy (my ride or die) and we decided to put on the heating which was directly behind my bed. After about 5 minutes of laying in my bed, It was as if our neighbors were cooking goat meat. The aroma increased gradually and I asked my rommie if she could perceive it as well, she said yeah but that it seemed to have been coming from my bed side....Say what?!!! I jumped up quickly but it was too late. My back hair had already burnt and this brought it down to about ear length. At this point, I had given up the hopes of having my hair down to bra strap length. I stopped all efforts and decided to wait for God’s time. 


My front hair kept growing but the back remained the same. It was as if it was growing fuller but remained stagnant in length. Some people actually taught it was nice and long but Oh well! (I dint really care lol). 


Anyways, towards the end of uni, the back began to grow but my hair was still unequal and I refused to trim it any further cause I had lost interest.
When I returned to Nigeria, I was advised to trim it since it was quite long but unequal and so I reluctantly did. After few months, it began to grow longer and this time, equally. I was happy but I dint want to revive my hopes just yet. I kept braiding and fixing my hair, and to my surprise, it got to collarbone length 


and right now, it is on the armpit length.



So guys, after all the struggles, I am happy to say I am one step away from bra strap length..whoop! whoop! My mum was right! I guess there is hope after all. At last, Good luck has decided to smile at me lol. I just hope it's for real this time though. 


Have you guys had any hair struggles? Care to share?

Wednesday, 12 November 2014

MY WEIRD DREAM SERIES!!!

Hey guys,

It’s been a day away from here and it feels like forever phew!. I hope you all have been good? Well, I have been myself; just that it’s been getting busier by the day and the week seems to be going really slow but hey! I can’t complain.


So I have been having some weird dreams or rather, do I say, I have been on a weird streak of particularly bizarre dreams lately, at least, thrice in a row now and it’s no longer funny.

Three days ago, I had a dream that I was all dressed up as a sandwich laying in bed waiting for my date (who does that?). Suddenly, I hear a scream outside my window, then I rush to see what had happened, only to see me kneeling and sobbing beside a guy on the ground, who in fact, was Benedict Cumber-batch (lol.. what a dream!). With so much confusion in my head, I turned to see if I was actually in a different world, probably the spirit world or something, only to see this old man in the room from nowhere, bleeding profusely, asking that we trade lives (huh!). I screamed the hell out of my lungs and then, I woke up feeling so strange and sweaty. That was freaky as hell.

Thinking it was one of those crazy imaginations that pop up randomly in your head and reveal themselves as dreams, another episode of the dream series came up the following night, and this time, more vividly. I was on something that looked like a fairy boat and then I saw one of my teachers from high school (it’s funny how I dream of people from years back). He gave me a pen and asked that I write my name on his palm (creepy much!!), the next thing, I find myself in the bathroom of my old house (like how the hell did I get there), hearing some music somewhere around the house, eventually tracing it to the living room where there were loads of kids doing the birthday party kids stuff. Suddenly and out of nowhere, a huge bear appears and everyone starts freaking out. The next thing I know, everyone’s gone but me. So I start running out of the house, towards a building full of people, but the further I run, the farther away the building gets. Eventually, I get exhausted, fall to the ground, then the bear approaches me, jumps right after me and BAM!!! I’m awake. It felt so real (realer than reality itself). I became scared because this was the second time in a row I was having a strange dream which was beginning to affect my sleep and it wasn't even sexy at all.

The kingdom of God suffered violence and the Violent taketh it by force. I decided I was going to have my normal sleep the following night. Yes! I was ready to take it by force. I was tired of the devil tormenting my night with weird creepy dreams. 

Yesterday I was sure I was going to have my normal undisrupted sleep as I said my normal night prayers, but this time, I changed my bed sheet, sprinkled my room and bed with anointing oil, changed my sleeping position, and placed my bible right on my chest (yes I went deep like that lol). Thinking I would have had a decent peaceful sleep, It was as if I had just made it worse for myself by placing my head where my feet would normally be.  I turned off the lights and set off for dream land with a sense of relief and a big smile on my face.

I finally found myself and another colleague from work, sitting before a client as our boss had sent us to the client’s office for a brief meeting. After the meeting was over, I decided to get myself a snack, so I went to an eatery close by to get one. When I got there, I noticed I was the only one and it felt really deserted like no one had ever been there before. I headed on still to the counter and met this old woman, bought my snack and requested for my change. She brought out some old rotten looking naira notes and handed them to me. Then I made a joke while requesting for a better looking change saying ‘’Madam!, why you dey give me this Ebola looking money now...abeg change am’’ (who send me message abeg...why dint I live that joke for basket mouth, may be it would have been different this time). That was how this woman made this strange looking grin and handed me a better change. The next thing I know, I find myself back at work, having trouble moving my mouth and cannot talk, also having trouble breathing, trying to explain to people that I’m having trouble breathing, but my face feels stuck like am having a stroke and can only make incoherent sounds, temperature rising, heart beating faster, getting into panic mode and eventually waking up like I had been struggling in bed for 5 minutes.  My bible was somewhere on the floor as I probably had been turning continuously.
 This was the height of it, it was as if I had gotten the Ebola virus over night. I had to live to my mother’s room and I have no intentions of sleeping alone until further notice.

Has anyone had weirder dreams than mine? Please how did you deal? Help a sister!!

  

Monday, 10 November 2014

WORST NEWS FOR THE WEEK!!

Hey guys,

I was preparing to live my house this morning when I heard  the tragic news about the death of Dr Myles Munroe, a popular gospel, motivational and inspirational speaker, along side his wife Ruth and Daughter in a plane crash yesterday, the 9th of November 2014.

I sat down in bed with a great shock and a lot going through my mind like what?? how??? why??...How can someone be here one minute and gone the next minute. The worst part of it was that I was listening to one of his teachings on you tube about 'Rediscovering the Kingdom' just on Saturday only to wake up to the news of his death :(....but really,..how???. This is really heart breaking and weakening, like I am still in shock and I just cant fathom why good people have to die. More worse, while they are right in the middle of carrying out Godly duties just like the 150 people that got crushed under TB Joshua's building, the various church bombings, the bus of convention returnees that got burnt half way home and probably many others across the world.

When I hear things like these, it just reminds me of what God says about the coming of the son of man. No man knoweth the time nor the day he shall come or this thing called 'death'. Truly the ways of God, who can understand it? Here one minute, gone the next!. Indeed we cannot question God.


'The greatest tragedy is not death but life without a purpose'. We truly can say that Dr Myles Munroe did live a purpose filled life. He traveled around the world touching peoples lives and offering motivations to thousands and millions of people (I for one am which), through his wisdom and powerful quotes, books, teachings and sermons. My favorite book of his is 'In pursuit of purpose', a very educative and inspiring book which gave me a confirmation on somethings and a better understanding in some areas of my life, most importantly, the importance of knowing and achieving your purpose in life. He really has left his foot prints in the sands of time, and though my heart is heavy, I take solace in the fact that he has gone to a better place to be with the lord. Your legacy lives on Dr Myles Munroe.

This teaches us to do the best to live our lives fully cuz nothing is promised tomorrow. Life is full of so many inexplicable  circumstances, it is too short for one to engage in frivolities. Do as much as you can to impact in others positively so that when you go, you can be assured a fulfilled life and would be remembered for good.

Rest on Munroe's,,,May God console the rest of your family. :(.

Wednesday, 5 November 2014

THE MUSIC IN MY SOUL!!!

Hi Guys,

Its another Wednesday and I hope you all are having a good week? Mine seems to be going pretty chilled and fast.
For some reason, I woke up yesterday morning feeling a bit weird and down. I din't seem to understand why I would wake up feeling like I had been transported to a different world entirely. It felt completely unusual and really dull which seemed quite scary and depressing. I guess I was having an epiphany or It just finally hit me that I am actually getting old as I was + 1 two days ago lol. Somehow sha, I was  able to get myself out of that scary state through the help of some music.

Oh! did I mention that music is one of my inspirations? I never really discovered the power of music on till my Uni days when I experienced quite a lot of emotions ranging from anxiety before presentations, depressions and frustrations after having bad days or going through different challenges. I had to be my own motivation and I was forced to find daily inspirations that would constantly keep me on the go, and then, I found Music.


Apart from gospel songs, one of the songs I found really uplifting and fell in love with was a song by Katty Perry tittled Firework. The sample lyrics goes like this: 'Do you ever feel like a plastic bag drifting through the wind, wanting to start again? Do you ever feel so paper thin like a house of cards, one blow away from caving in? Do you ever feel already buried deep? Six feet under screams, but no one seems to hear a thing? Do you know that there's still a chance for you 'cause there's a spark in you? You just gotta ignite the light and let it shine, just own the night like the 4th of July cause baby you're a firework..come on, show 'em what you're worth....'
I really love this song because the lyrics really speak for themselves. I love the fact that it's a really fun song that is upbeat, uplifting, and most importantly, about getting in touch with your inner self, inner power and being yourself, looking beyond those self doubts and negative feelings.

I really do love music and I love to sing. Even though you would not find me on x-factor as I am not the best singer in the world, the rhythm of a song and the beats that go through my body makes me feel good. There's nothing better than feeling a song, feeling the emotions of the lyrics, relating with the words and feeling the beat go through your ears and out of your toes. Music inspires me to think more deeply and notice things I probably haven't noticed before, it opens my inner eyes and helps me to express myself. I feel that there is always a song out there that can relate to different situations and help feel better about them.

Music sure does have an effect on most of us in some ways; It could bring back good memories, bad memories and can create the most magical moments of our lives. I can hardly imagine what the world would be like if there was no music.

Every now and then, we all need a little musical inspiration to brighten up our day so I decided to list a few songs that I find really uplifting, heart warming and inspiring. Most of the songs are classics to be listened to over and over again no matter how old we are and I hope you like them and they inspire you just like they inspire me.


  1. Walking on sunshine - Katrina & waves:
'I'm walking on sunshine, wooh, I'm walking on sunshine, I'm walking on sunshine and its starting to feel good'. 
This is quite a famous song that makes me smile, the upbeat tunes automatically brings a smile to anyone just by listening to it. It feels me with energy and urges me to dance. Its a happy song so make sure to dance as you listen to it.

    2. Return to Innocence - Enigma

This is an extremely strong and powerful song that invokes deep emotions. It reminds you to be yourself. Don't be afraid to show your emotions because denying them is just denying who you are. While others may see revealing your emotions as an act of vulnerability, its only by embracing your emotions that you move a step forward towards being who you really are.
  
    3. When you believe - Whitney Housten & Mariah Carey
I've always been a great fan of Whitney's songs (rest on Whitney). This is an amazing song about the power of hope and faith. If there are ever any times you're loosing hope, just listen to this song and hang in there. The miracles you want to create in life comes from first believing in yourself and then others. 

   4. You gotta want it - Roberta Gold.

This is a really powerful and inspiring song that would charge you up in the few minutes that you listen to it. If you want to get what you want, you have to want it from the bottom of your heart and give all that you can give. As long as you have the burning passion, nothing will seem impossible.

   5. Somewhere over the rainbow - Israel 'IZ' Kamakawiwo'ole's

'' Somewhere over the rainbow, way up high, and the dreams that you dream of once in a lullaby. Somewhere over the rainbow, blue birds fly......dreams really come true''. This classic song is guaranteed to cheer you up. It is really peaceful and soothing. It is one of my favorite 'alone' songs.

   6. Its a beautiful day - Micheal Buble

I really love this song! each time I hear it, it makes me perk up and smile. No matter how bad your day may be, there is always something beautiful happening. the song reminds us that everyday is a beautiful day by itself. Its sends a message that no matter whats going on in our lives, there's so much to be thankful for.

   7. Don't worry Be happy- Bobby McFerrin

This catchy song is ridiculously happy. Its hard to be angry when you listening to this particular song. The lyrics are pretty simple: don't worry be happy, dont worry be happy now. 'The landlord says your rent is late he may have to litigate, don't worry be happy. In every life we have some trouble, when you worry you make it double.'' I really love the rhymes :) .

  8. That's what friends are for - Dionne Warwick, Steve Wonder, Gladys Knight & Elton John

This is a very beautiful all-time classic that has been sung by various artists. It is basically about the beauty of friendships and how we can always count on each other no matter what happens, good times or bad times. That's after all, what friends are for.

  9. You get what you give - New Radicals

If you've ever seen the inspiring movie 'Click', you'll probably love this song. It is basically about being true to yourself in a world where everyone tries to be someone else. Don't you ever ever give up on your dreams because you have what it takes to achieve what you want.

 10. Music of my heart - N'Sync & Gloria Estefan

This is probably one of my best songs. I really really find this song so beautiful and heart felt. The song expresses gratitude to the people who have always been there for us when ever we need them, the people who made us who and what we are today, people who taught us the amazing things in the world and made us bigger than we thought we could. It is truly the music of my heart. 

There are a lot more songs, probably hundreds and thousands of great songs out there that can really have great impact in our lives, and with the way our world and day to day activities can be quite stressful, discouraging or frustrating, it is quite mandatory for one to find some sort of inspiration in other to be constantly on the go. Music costs nothing and it is every where. It is the easiest and most accessible source of inspiration. So lets try to get some music into our lives for the rest of the week. 

Enjoy the rest of your week!! :).

Sunday, 2 November 2014

22 LESSONS LIFE HAS TAUGHT ME!!!




Hey guys,

It’s been 2 months and 6 days since I started my baby blog, and yeah!! I am still a fresh newbie :) .
Today’s post is probably going to be quite a long and special one considering the fact that it’s my 22nd post on the morning of Monday, the 3rd day of November which happens to be my birthday and I am feeling 22!!. A big shout out to all Scorpios in the house..Whoop! Whoop!..We rock baby!!...okay, back to me.

I specifically intended for this post to be up on this day because it’s my 22nd post and my 22nd birthday..yeah!! It’s cool like that lol. 

I am really grateful to God, if not for whom, I wouldn't be writing this today. I was greeted with 22 by Taylor Swift and a cake from my friend Oby of Obyzworld, bless her loads. Its actually hard to believe that I have been on planet earth for 2 decades and 2 years. Gosh! I feel so old. Girls are really getting old yo! Where has the time gone? Seriously, I feel like I am nowhere near the same person I was a year ago at this time. Its crazy!! Anyways, I guess growth is a necessity and change is constant. 

I was thinking and remembering the days when life felt so simple that the only thing I cared about was how much candy I was going to eat and the only thing I worried about was how to tie my shoe lace, the days when mum was responsible for everything: the food I ate, the puffy shouldered dresses I wore, the friends I made and the life I lived. As I grow older, I have come to realize that truly, life isn't a bed of roses. It becomes more complicated as the stress of the real world slowly creeps in. I have learnt that life is a journey, sometimes, the road could be smooth, other times, it could be rough but in either case, there is always a lesson to be learnt.


Here are 22 lessons life has taught me. I do apologize for the length and I hope you do Enjoy!!

1.       BE GRATEFUL FOR WHAT YOU HAVE


When I was younger, I took a lot of things for granted, after all, I was young and didn't know what life could be like on the other side. Why should I have smaller toys? Why should my food be meatless? Why should I live in a smaller house with a smaller room and my friends in bigger houses and bigger rooms? Why can’t I have the best life? I never thought about how lucky I was to have had toys when other kids were making planes out of paper and cars out of bottle caps and sticks. I never thought about how lucky I was to have had food while others were begging on the streets. I also never thought about the fact that I had a smaller house while people slept under the bridge. As I grew older, I began to appreciate things a lot more as I realized that all the things I’d been given were not rights but privileges. Life alone is enough reason to be grateful and thankful.

2.       EVERYDAY IS A NEW BEGINNING

 
 Life and working with kids especially, has taught me that everyday is a new beginning. Sometimes, we may not have the best of days, things may not go as planned, targets may not be met, mistakes may be made, frustrations may present themselves and many more. But every new day is a blessing of a new beginning, a blank page in the dairy of my life, filled with incredible amount of opportunities and possibilities to move my life to the direction I want it to go. So, I have learnt to not carry baggage's from previous days to the next but to start afresh with each new day, realize the opportunities that present themselves in them and make good use of them.  

3.       IGNORE WHAT PEOPLE SAY


No one has it all figured out, especially not the people who act like they do and judge you because of that. I am usually one who tries to not hurt one person and at the same time, please the other person but guess what? It never works. You can actually never please anyone. If you like, cut your throat for them, they will never be satisfied. The human mind is never satisfied. So, I have learnt that pretending to be someone or something you are not, because you care so much about what people say or because you are trying to please a bunch of humans, will only make you lose the value of who you really are and also end you up making everyone else happy but yourself. The people who matter would love you anyways and the only person you should be bothered to please is God.

4.       GET RID OF THINGS THAT ADD ZERO VALUE TO YOUR LIFE


Life has taught me that there really isn't any point occupying space with things that add no value to your life. So, get rid of habits that don’t improve your life or people who aren't challenging you to be a better version of yourself and surround yourself with self driven individuals and people who make you happy rather than those who make your life complicated. You’ll be much happier in the end.

5.       LIVE IN THE MOMENT


The moment is all there is. I have learnt that worrying about the future doesn’t make it any less scary. It’s taken some time but I just don’t worry about much these days I just think its best to go with the flow because it makes life more enjoyable plus, the future will come weather you dwell on it or not. So, you might as well quit living in the past nor the future and just enjoy the moment.

6.       DANCE IN THE RAIN


Have you noticed that kids seem to get the idea more than a lot of adults? I guess that’s why life seems a lot easier and simpler while we are kids than when we become adults. Everybody wants a happy and beautiful life; no one wants a life full of challenges or adversities. But one thing I have learnt is that there really can’t be any rainbow without a little rain or a dark cloud. The storm must surely come but what matters most is how we respond to it when it does. You can choose to get drowned by complaining and despairing about all your challenges/problems or you can choose to swim and make the best of the worst situation.

7.       FOLLOW YOUR PASSION.


I often hear people say or list things that they love and hope to accomplish in the future and I often hear other people say things like 'why in the world would you want to do photography for a living or create art for a living, you would be better off going into engineering or law'. I have come to realize that pay matters a lot but following your passion and doing what you love is not about a job but about a life journey. Everyone has different talents and passions so everyone should have the opportunity and ability to chase their dreams. They may fail or it may not work for them but at least, they will never look back and wonder ‘what if?’.

8.       GIVING UP AND LETTING GO ARE TWO DIFFERENT THINGS.


 Every single day, we experience challenges, frustrations and obstacles that seem to be without doors or windows. At times, we feel like we are at the end of our rope and we have no other choice than to give up. Life has taught me that giving up is not an option but we can choose to let go. To give up is to accept failure and do nothing but to let go is to allow yourself energy to proceed to, and tackle the next obstacle in front of you. You don't want to exhaust yourself on something that would not serve you. Being attached to anything wont free up the space for other opportunities. I have learnt that everything happens 'for us' and not 'to us' and if a way through an obstacle poses difficulty, then get to find other ways. There's under, over and around. There is always another way so don't give up but at the same time, dont waste your time on things that wouldn't serve you in the long run. 

9.       CONFIDENCE IS THE NEW SEXY


Gone are the days when looks alone were attractive. Yes! That tiny black top, flowery pants, heels and make up can make me feel really sexy, but life has taught me that the sexiest thing about me, doesn’t need to have a colour or a shape, mustn't be touched or held, but can certainly be felt and that is 'Self confidence'. I used to have very little confidence in my self but I have learnt that self confidence is simply self acceptance: checkout my new tagWhen you know who you are, and you embrace and accept yourself just the way you were made, develop the inner strength to believe in who you are, own your body and keep in mind a positive view of yourself, then you can boldly say I Am Sexy!!

10.   STOP COMPARING YOURSELF


I spent most of my years comparing myself with others (usually people with more energy and ability than I had), especially at secondary school during talent shows and award days lol. I even tried to emulate one or two people I admired but ended up with disastrous results. I realised that the only life I could live was mine and the only work I can do is mine. It is because we are all different that we are special so stop comparing and start loving yourself.

11.   ANGER NEVER SOLVES ANTHING, IT ONLY MAKES THINGS WORSE


Getting angry is completely normal but letting it get a hold of you is destructive. I have noticed and learnt that almost always, being angry hurts you more than the other thing or the other person. So, when we get angry, we waste our own time and energy because we rarely achieve our intentions which are usually to make the other person feel as bad as or worse than they made us feel, but it never works out that way and it doesn’t solve any problem. So, its best to stop wasting much time and energy being angry and channel the time and energy into something more productive

12.   NOT ALL THAT GLITTERS IS GOLD


Mother always recited this famous proverb to us when we were little but I never fully understood its meaning till I was about 12 and had to start going to the market. Most times, I'd been deceived into buying fruits and vegetables in cartons only to get home discovering that the large glossy ones at the top were hiding the small rotten ones at the bottom all along. The same goes for people. A lot of focus and attention is giving to how we are on the outside rather than how we are on the inside. This is not to say that displaying ones dirty laundry is good, but we are well trained at putting on a good face even when the inside might not be as good. I have learnt that beauty is only skin deep. When we fail to look beyond the surface in terms of someone's face, fame, titles wealth and material worth, then we certainly can be deceived very much like buying those fruits and vegies, only to find the rotten ones below.

13.   MONEY IS GOOD BUT IT DOESNT BUY HAPPINESS


Over the years, I have heard a lot of stories where people make a lot of money, become famous, travel round the world and get the best of life’s possessions. I have also heard of stories where people build a lot of wealth, fame, power, luxury and yet, commit suicide. I have come to the realization that money can certainly buy a position but not respect, it can buy a bed but not sleep, it can buy you a clock but not time, a book but not knowledge, medicine but not health, sex but not love, blood but not life. Money is good but it isn’t everything. Its best to set your priorities right according to your believes.

14.   BEAUTY IS OFTEN FOUND IN THE MOST UNEXPECTED PLACES


      A lot of us believe that we have to go all the way out or travel long distances in other to find our blessings, beauty or that which we desire. We fail to look around and within us to appreciate the simple things because we are in search of better things. Sometimes we pray for God to send us the right people or the right things not knowing they are just right there beside us, behind us, in front  or even within us. Sometimes, the treasures we seek are just an inch away from us if only we can open our eyes and look around us.   

15.   YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOU THINK


         I'm usually not one who does a lot of workouts or exercise especially considering the fact that I have no weight to burn lol. On this particular day, I had slept over at a friend's and I was woken up for a jog. Along the road, there was a fairly steep hill that takes about a minute to sprint up at full speed. My friend ran up and jogged down repeatedly, asking that I do it thrice. I had tried once, but at that point, my legs and lungs were crying for mercy. I felt sure that my body could no longer run a single more step. Just as I was about calling it a day, a little girl from across the other side of the road came running up the hill and down repeatedly. In that moment, I was gingered and decided to complete mine as it was quite a shame. Quite an insignificant moment, but I learnt something; even as I was sure I was physically spent, I found deeper reserves of strength left to tap. I wondered what else my mind could have been lying about. It turns out that we all have deep wells of strength that we may never even know exists as they are closely guarded by our brain that would rather loaf than take you to the next level. But don't be decieved, you are physically, mentally and emotionally stronger than you think. 

16.   STAY IN CHARGE OF YOUR LIFE


Life has taught me that giving people the power over your life either by making your own decisions, taking your own  responsibilities, influencing your actions or reactions, simply makes you an instrument to them. No one can provoke you or make you unhappy without your permission. Everything you do or everything that happens in your life is your responsibility so stop blaming, complaining or criticizing and accept full responsibility whether you caused anything or not. Taking responsibility for your life will empower you, foster success and heighten self esteem, all of which can lead to increased happiness.

17.   A STEP AT A TIME, LIFE IS NOT A RACE


I have learnt that life is not a race but a journey and the destination is just a tiny slice of the journey. So therefore, direction is better than speed. Do not run through life so fast that you forget not only where you have been but also where you are going. It is not a race, there is no need to compete It is a journey to be savored each step of the way.

18.   NEVER USE YOUR PAST TO JUDGE YOUR FUTURE

  
A lot of times, we tend to dwell on our past for different reasons and the longer we dwell on our past, the less future we have to live in. Life has taught me that no matter how dirty our past may be, our future is spotless. We are not defined by our past but prepared by it. So, never use your past to detect or judge your future. Just because you failed in the past doesn't mean you'll fail in the future that is why it is ahead of us and not behind us.

19.   SELF CONCEPT MATTERS A LOT


 How you view/see yourself, not just in the mirror, determines  how you will experience life. If you see yourself in a positive and healthy light, your life experiences will be positive and healthy. It does not mean, of course, that your life would be free of challenges and adversity, just that you would have a healthier approach to dealing with them. If your opinion of yourself is shaky and fragile, you will find life's challenges overwhelming. 

20.   IT DOES'NT MATTER HOW MANY TIMES YOU FALL



As humans, we are bound to fall. Falling down is inevitable as life is a journey full of obstacles, but rising back on your fit is a choice that only you can make. Its either you get stuck on the fall and stop trying, or you cry a little, get back up and try again. I've learnt that the ups and downs of life are what makes it valuable. Battling through the tough times makes you a stronger person, challenging you to rise and conquer. Instead of feeling sorry for yourself or laying down in pity each time you fall, turn the negative feeling into a motivation and bounce back on your feet. Life must go on weather you like it or not so you best rise up and keep moving.

21.   GOOD THINGS COME TO THOSE WHO DONT WAIT


I used to believe the quote that 'good things come to those who wait' but I think what it actually means is that 'good things come to those who wait on the lord', not to those who wait for the right opportunity, permission from others, until everything is perfect or until they have the time. Waiting to take action is just another excuse for inaction and wont get you any where. I have learnt that when ever I take action, the right opportunities present themselves and they are often better than I imagined. I only need to give myself permission to do my best work. So if you have a dream, an idea, a vision or an opportunity, start now and not when all your ducks are in a row because good things come to those who don't wait. 

22.  LIFE DOESN'T COME WRAPPED WITH A BOW BUT IT'S STILL A GIFT


Yes life can sometimes be harsh, rough, tough and unfair but its still a gift given to us by God so we have to cherish it and be grateful for it because, not everyone gets the chance to stay alive. Every challenge or adversity I've been faced with, the mistakes and lessons, have helped shaped me into who I am today and I thank God for them all. I have a lot to learn. If I've learnt anything, its that I know almost nothing and that I am often wrong about what I think I know. Life has many lessons left to teach me and I am looking forward to learning them all.

Thanks for reading.
Please feel free to live a comment.:) 

Oh!! and by the way, you mustn't have a Google account to live a comment. Anyone and everyone can live a comment, just use the Anonymous option in the comment box below if you dont have a Google account. 

Photo Credit: The talented chidi Lex. Follow him on instagram @thelexash and checkout his Blog.
Make Up: By my beautiful Ufeli Ajeka. Follow her on instagram @monettesbeauties.